When I took the bar exam, a friend of mine started drinking coffee brewed with caffeinated water. For his sake, that’s no longer the worst bar exam prep strategy out there. Apparently Kim Kardashian relied on a veritable coven. Kim Kardashian recently failed the bar — though she can take solace in knowing that she’s still likely a better lawyer than anyone involved with writing All’s Fair — and she knows where her prep strategy went off the rails: the psychics.
Talk about a new level to ineffective assistance of counsel.
Psychic: The spirits are telling me to acknowledge… does the letter M have meaning?
Kardashian: Yes! Mary.
Psychic: And Mary has passed?
Kardashian: Yes… and she was a life in being at the time the interest was created!
Kardashian, of course, continues her quest to become a California lawyer — despite lacking an undergraduate degree — through California’s Law Office Study Program apprenticeship, allowing applicants to take the bar after learning under an attorney’s supervision as opposed to law school. It’s a time-honored path to the profession… just like Abraham Lincoln did it. Though Abe wasn’t posting self-portraits highlighting his ass while complaining about Torts.
Or did he? Honestly, records from that era are spotty at best.
After passing the so-called baby bar, the full monster is the next hurdle on Kardashian’s quest.
The California Bar is designed to break one’s spirit, but that doesn’t give actual spirits any advantage. I mean, what’s next? Deciding civil rights for women on the back of a Supreme Court seance to divine the will of a 17th century witchhunter?
In fairness, there’s nothing to suggest that Kardashian replaced professional bar prep with Madame Res Ipsa. But mainlining metaphysical reassurance doesn’t put an applicant in the right headspace. We’re not pinning everything on psychic-induced false confidence, but it couldn’t have helped.
Kardashian’s drive to become a lawyer without bothering to go to school remains peak celebrity self-indulgence. But remember that she’s probably done more for criminal justice reform than most senators campaigning on the issue. If anything, the problem with Kardashian’s pursuit of the Esq. is that she doesn’t need it. She already has what she needs to accomplish the work she’s set out for herself: a grasp of fairness, massive resources, and good lawyers saved in her phone.
At the end of the day, the people she wants to help don’t care if she’s their lawyer or running the legal non-profit that gets them the representation they need.
Joe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter or Bluesky if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news. Joe also serves as a Managing Director at RPN Executive Search.
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