Bar None: Trump’s now-former press secretary Katie Zacharia billed herself as a “lawyer” in at least 18 Fox appearances, but no U.S. jurisdiction has any record of admitting her, including California where she at one point claimed to be a general counsel.

Out Of Office, Out Of Compliance: DHS kept airing its $20 million taxpayer-funded Trump ad blitz after Judge Jennifer Rochon’s TRO, and DOJ’s explanation is that agency counsel didn’t see the email until the next morning.

Flush With Ambition: Fifth Circuit conservatives complained that the First Amendment should protect creepers taking and posting surreptitious bathroom pics in case they want to troll trans people and call it political speech.

The Absolute Worst: Judge Ana Reyes spent months trusting the government’s lawyers, then Interior approved a plan in five days and cleared about 430 healthy trees from the East Potomac Golf Course Trump wants rebuilt.

Cooley Runnings: Cooley will move its associates to the Milbank salary scale on January 1, 2027, and is paying special bonuses for 2026.

Work From Mostly Anywhere: Quinn Emanuel’s remote policy now requires two years of experience, a year on-site first, and two three-day office stints annually, and it’s still one of the best policies in Biglaw.

A Great Benefit: Lowenstein Sandler now gives parents up to eight extra weeks of paid leave for a newborn’s NICU stay.

Trick Or Retainer: Send us the four words that would scare a lawyer most, and we’ll put the spookiest to a vote.

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